I hate you. Not all of the time, but a good 90% these days. Even when I liked you I hated you. Love and hate are very blurry feelings for me I suppose. I feel bad, but I fear the only reason I’m friends with you or put up with you is because I feel guilty. Guilty that I’d be abandoning you, and guilty that maybe I only enjoyed your company because I thought you enjoyed mine. Yes you’re right, I probably would’ve backed off when you got a girlfriend, but the only reason I’m not doing so now is to simply prove you wrong. You should know that you’re a douche bag and you lead girls on. I want you to stop touching me. It makes me want to vomit every single time. You abused your touching priveleges, and it made me like you. Maybe it was my fault but I was under the impression that when you didnt like a girl you backed off. You NEVER did that with me. That fucking pisses me off. You messed with my head asshole. You didn’t even have the decency to just come out with your feelings in the parking lot of Chilis when you had the chance, when the subject came up, instead you made me come out and ask you in the school parking lot, YOU made ME ask you. You basically forced me to inflict pain on myself because you didn’t have the balls to be honest. I hate that Chilis parking lot now. You made me listen to your problems, and then had the gall to do whatever it was you did with my hands. Playing with them, holding them, warming them. Whatever the fuck that was I hated you for it. I know, I initiated it, but I felt bad you had no jacket, I did the exact same thing to everyone else earlier that evening. You saw me. So I warmed your hands, is that a crime? You didnt have to hold on, or play with my hands. It wasnt an invitation, it was a freidly gesture. I rubbed ‘em and blew warm air one ‘em. THE END. But no, you had to hold on and you had to escalate it. If you didnt like me you shouldn’t have done that. Fucking admit it. You did it because you liked it. You loved getting me riled up.You loved getting me flustered You loved the feeling of being liked. You crave that feeling and you harvest it by surrounding yourself with me. Why are you scared of losing me dick? What did I ever do for you besides put up with your crazy shit? What have you ever done for me to put up with it? I guess its my good natured self that wanted to waste my time with you. Now I’m stuck. I’ve invested myself with you. I can’t back off now because you’ll know its beacuse you don’t like me. I think thats sick. You say you want to fall in love with a girl you are friends with. ROFL. So who is this asian bitch you’re dating now?? Some complete STRANGER you met off the internet. Really? You are a hypocrite and a liar and I hate being around you. Do me a favor and never speak to me again. It is abundantly clear what you look for in a girl. You superficial, retarded piece of shit. And you can’t do parkour. You look like an idiot trying to put all this stuff you read on the internet or in books, into reality. You do it all the time. Pretending to be so well versed in something. All of it just facts you spew forth that you read somewhere. You’re views in spirits and such are interesting and cute, but they really couldve been invented by a total crack head. Are you a crack baby? Wouldn’t surprise me. You’re parents were into that shit right? Thats another thing. You were a total dick to your family. I was there to witness it first hand. I wanted to smack you and tell you to show some goddamned respect. You act like you are so above them. It was a horrible thing to witness. What kind of a heartless bastard is like that to their parents? Oh yeah the kind raised in foster care and uses it as an excuse to be a dick. “I was in foster care Im not used to being around people!” Whine whine whine. I don’t mind listening to people whine but Id like to be listened to as well. And when I talk about other people you assume everything applies to you too. The world does not revolve around YOU! Neither does my world asshole. I think you’re an insecure bitch who seeks attenttion that he never got when he was younger and in the process you go around fucking with my emotions. Then I just become this girl “who wanted you” or “totally wanted your dick”. I know that you told me a bunch of BS in the car so you wouldn’t hurt my feelings, and so I wouldn’t go away because for some reason you enjoy having my pathetic self around you, but Jesus, give me a heads up when you are gonna behave like a hypocritical bastard. I don’t wanna find out from facebook or from heather, the girl you didn’t want to like you. Yet you still hung out with her!? What was she supposed to think? “Oh hey come over and hang out with me for hours on end. You and me. Alone” What makes no sense is that I liked you and you still wanted me around but when its every other girl they become annoyances? How was I supposed to read that? How was I supposed to get the message that you didn’t like me? You never cowered from my touch, you never dodged me. You acted like you wanted to be with me. My felings may have been “obvious” as you put it, but yours weren’t. You are such a fucking prick. Honestly, its disgusting. If you don’t like a girl back off!? Don’t invite us to do stuff or play footsie etc etc etc. Don’t say you wanna be friends with a girl before you can fall in love with them. Don’t make fun of girls who like you. Can’t you relate to how they feel? Have you never experianced unrequited love? It sucks to like someone and not have them like you back. It hurts. Its heart breaking. And you just sit there and mock me to my face. Like in the theatre talking about that girl: “Girls look soooo dumb talking to the guys they like. Look at her she looks ridiculous. That guy is so not into her”. How will that ever make me want to be around you or be friends with you? I want friends who empathize. I wish upon you the same heartbreak that all the girls in your life have gone through. I havent even been through heartbreak and I can understand how it must feel. I cried for you. I hate that i did that because you were not worth any of those tears. Not a single one. I want you to know that if your internet asian bitch breaks your heart, I wont be there to help you. I will sit there and watch your misery, laugh and be on my way. If she doesnt break your heart, I will wait for the next girl. The day you experience heartbreak will be the day that you lose me as friend. I will have been vindicated and I will feel as if my time in this friendship will have run out. I will feel an intense liberation and I will smile. Its pathetic that you think that this stranger is your soulmate because shes exactly like you. Thats called narcissim dipshit. Whats truly sad, B******, is that you don’t really know me at all and you claim to call me a friend. Right now you believe everything is fine and dandy between us. That I was only mad because you lied to me and I am now totally fine. If you ‘d bothered to get to know me at all, you’d realize that this is all a lie. A lie I fabricated for your sake. But you go on believing what makes you happy and turn a blind eye to my pain. Its no concern of yours right?? So long as I’m there to listen to you in random parking lots for the rest of eternity, my own personal brand of hell. Its sad really. Do you even know me at all? I thinks its hilarious that you thought you’d be losing me, you conceited prick, when its very clear that I’m losing you in this situation. I can’t wait until the day you come out of the closet you fag. I hate you.
